Valentine’s Day is a day for many to celebrate their loved ones and set a specific day aside to cherish a relationship; romantic or not. But for some others, it’s a reminder of a failed relationship, a broken heart, or the loss of a loved one. My heart goes out to everyone who’s hurting today. You deserve the most love. Whatever situation you may be in, you are alive and well, and you are strong. You’re surviving and thriving. If no one has told you yet, I love you, and I mean the real, authentic, silly you.

I’d love to say I fall in the happier category, but I’m in a weird limbo. My heart is half full of love while the other heart has love seeping out of each crack with every heartbeat. Valentine’s Day signaled the start of a break for us. He wanted to simply end it all, with no concern. I convinced him to take a break instead. A pathetic move, but I can’t find it in my heart to let him throw it all away. It’s part not letting him determine our fate and part me just not wanting to let go of who I believe is my One. I’ve never believed someone to be my One until now. I find it hard to fathom that I could love someone more than I love him. It’s hard when you know there is an end. It’s even harder knowing exactly when that end is.

I’ve never felt so sad to hear “Happy Valentine’s Day” towards me.

Tomorrow will be a completely new day. A new life.

I want to take this time apart to focus on myself just as much as he (says) will be focusing on himself. I can only hope I come out okay. My heart breaks in pieces, but I’m honestly glad to have this new job distract me.