To what extent are your feelings based on logic rather than emotions? We typically think in two manners: with your head or with your heart. But in essence, don’t we all think with our head because all of our thoughts, emotions, and physical feelings come from the brain?

It is said that if you smile, you will feel happier. So there may be a portion of your emotions that is controlled by your body.

If you’re making a decision that is normally based in emotions and feelings, such as making a decision about an interpersonal relationship with someone, how much of it is based on logic – what’s best for both of you – or emotions – what you feel is best for both of you? Is there ever a decision that is truly objective and unbiased? What if the logic that we think is truly objective is actually triggered by our emotions?

Let’s say, for example, that you believe the best solution to an interpersonal conflict is to cut off contact with the other person because you want them to be happy and you feel as though you are dragging down the other person with your own internal conflicts, making you difficult to be friends with. To what extent is that logic (wanting the other person to be happy and being selfless – it’s simply the best solution) and what extent is that decision based off feeling (you believe you’re not deserving of this friend, you feel the friendship no longer has any benefits, you subconsciously do not value the friendship as much as you once did). “It’s not you, it’s me.”

You see, there are two ways this situation can go and it all depends on how you feel. You could stop being friends with this person because things have changed and you no longer value the friendship as much, you believe you’re undeserving, etc. Or, on the other hand, you can work on yourself to become the person that your friend deserves, you work harder to preserve this friendship. And the outcome of this conflict – the same situation – can have two entirely different outcomes based on how you feel about the situation and yourself. If you’re in a positive mindset and believe, “Yeah! I can totally become a better person and work on myself!” You’re going to go with the option of becoming a better friend for this person. If you’re in a negative mindset and believe, “I’m such a bad friend, they deserve way more than what I can ever offer,” you’re going to go with the option of cutting off ties.

So, to what extent are our decisions inherently based on our feelings?

If you were feeling happy, would you make the same decision as if you were sad?

And to that end, what extent of our decisions are based on “gut feelings”? Because you somehow just think it’s the right thing to do, without logic, without being able to explain why – simply because intuition told you so.

These are the things I obsess about sometimes. Life is a great mystery, and I’m grateful it is because that means I’ll never stop asking “Why” and wanting to know more. It gives my anxious mind something to wonder about. I always want things to make sense, so I inherently find the things that don’t make sense and zero in on those things. For once, my anxious mind is being put to use on productive things rather than destructive ideas.